Starting a Virtual Book Club for Two
Share stories, explore ideas, and deepen your connection through literature. Create your own intimate book club designed specifically for long distance couples.
Why Book Clubs Work for Long Distance Relationships
Reading the same book creates a shared intellectual and emotional experience that transcends physical distance. Unlike watching a movie that's over in two hours, a book unfolds over days or weeks, giving you ongoing conversation topics and creating anticipation for your next discussion.
Research shows that couples who read together report higher empathy, better communication, and deeper understanding of each other's perspectives. Books expose you to new ideas, challenge assumptions, and provide safe frameworks for discussing complex topics. When you share these experiences with your partner, you're building emotional and intellectual intimacy.
A book club for two combines the best of both worlds: the structure and purpose of a traditional book club with the intimacy and flexibility of a private conversation between partners. This guide will help you establish a rewarding reading tradition that strengthens your relationship.
Setting Up Your Two-Person Book Club
Step 1: Establish Your Reading Schedule
Consistency creates anticipation and accountability.
Pacing Options:
- Monthly: One book per month, discussion at month's end (most common)
- Bi-weekly: Finish book in two weeks, good for shorter books or avid readers
- Six-week cycles: Allows for longer books or busy schedules
- Flexible pacing: "Whenever we both finish" (requires good communication)
Discussion Timing:
- Single session: One long discussion (1-2 hours) after finishing
- Chapter check-ins: Brief calls every few chapters
- Part-by-part: Discuss after each section for longer books
- Ongoing chat: Share reactions via text as you read, formal discussion at end
Step 2: Choose Your Book Selection Method
Taking Turns:
- Alternate who chooses each book
- Ensures both partners' interests represented
- Exposes each other to new genres
- Creates ownership and investment
Collaborative Choice:
- Both suggest 3 options
- Discuss and choose together
- Ensures mutual interest
- Good for first few books
Theme-Based:
- Choose themes in advance (travel, mystery, classics)
- Select books fitting that theme
- Creates focused reading journey
- Educational and structured
List-Based:
- Work through "1001 Books to Read Before You Die"
- Modern classics lists
- Award winners (Pulitzer, Man Booker, etc.)
- Celebrity book club picks (Oprah, Reese, etc.)
Step 3: Sync Your Editions
Having the same edition makes discussions easier (same page numbers).
Format Options:
- Physical books: Order same edition online
- E-readers: Purchase from same platform (Kindle, Apple Books)
- Library apps: Libby, OverDrive (free but may have wait lists)
- Audiobooks: Audible, Libro.fm (can listen together on calls)
- Mixed formats: Okay if you reference chapter/section instead of page numbers
Budget-Friendly Options:
- Local library physical books
- Free e-book apps (Libby, OverDrive, Hoopla)
- Used bookstores or ThriftBooks.com
- Book swapping services
- Project Gutenberg for classics (free)
Book Selection Strategies
For Beginning Your Book Club
Start strong with accessible, engaging books.
Ideal First Book Characteristics:
- 300 pages or less (achievable)
- Engaging plot or writing style
- Widely accessible themes
- Not too heavy/depressing for first experience
- Generates good discussion (not just plot-driven)
- Well-reviewed (4+ stars on Goodreads)
Excellent Starter Books:
- The Midnight Library by Matt Haig - Uplifting, philosophical, discussion-rich
- Anxious People by Fredrik Backman - Funny, heartwarming, character-driven
- The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho - Short, meaningful, universally appealing
- Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine - Engaging, funny, touching
- The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune - Charming, uplifting fantasy
Balancing Different Reading Preferences
If One Loves Fiction, Other Prefers Non-Fiction:
- Alternate genres monthly
- Try narrative non-fiction (reads like fiction)
- Choose based-on-true-events novels
- Pick books blending both (historical fiction)
If Reading Speeds Differ:
- Choose shorter books
- Give longer timeline for completion
- Faster reader can re-read or take notes for discussion
- Slower reader can supplement with audiobook
If Tastes Differ Significantly:
- Take strict turns choosing
- Find overlap genres (if you like thriller, they like mystery - read crime fiction)
- Try highly acclaimed books that transcend genres
- Be open-minded and give each other's choices fair chance
Genre Exploration
Variety keeps your book club fresh and expands both your horizons.
Fiction Genres to Explore:
- Literary Fiction
- Historical Fiction
- Mystery/Thriller
- Science Fiction
- Fantasy
- Romance
- Contemporary Fiction
- Classics
- Short Story Collections
Non-Fiction Categories:
- Memoir/Biography
- History
- Science
- Philosophy
- Self-Improvement
- Travel Writing
- Food & Culture
- Psychology
- Essays
Reading Strategies for Couples
Individual Reading
Most traditional approach - read separately, discuss together.
Advantages:
- Read at your own pace
- Flexible scheduling
- Form independent opinions
- Fresh perspectives for discussion
Tips:
- Set check-in points ("I'm on chapter 5, how about you?")
- Agree on spoiler boundaries
- Take notes or highlight passages to discuss
- Share brief reactions without spoiling
Synchronized Reading
Read the same chapters on the same schedule.
Advantages:
- Can discuss as you go
- Experience plot twists simultaneously
- No spoiler concerns
- Builds anticipation together
How to Implement:
- "This week we'll both read chapters 1-5"
- Brief mid-week check-in on progress
- Weekend discussion of that section
- Move to next section together
Reading Aloud Together
Take turns reading to each other over video call.
Advantages:
- Extremely intimate and bonding
- Guaranteed quality time together
- Great for bedtime routines
- Helps if one partner struggles with reading
- You can see/hear each other's reactions
How to Implement:
- Schedule regular reading times (30-60 minutes)
- Alternate who reads (every chapter, every page, etc.)
- Get comfortable - this is cozy quality time
- Pause to discuss interesting passages
- Record your position for next session
Best for: Poetry, short story collections, classics, children's books (nostalgic!)
Audiobook Listening Together
Listen to the same audiobook on synchronized schedules or simultaneously.
Simultaneous Listening:
- Both start audiobook at same time on call
- Mute call audio but stay connected visually
- Pause to discuss particularly striking moments
- Good for shorter pieces or specific chapters
Synchronized Schedules:
- Both listen to same chapters independently
- Check in on progress
- Discuss at scheduled intervals
- Great for commutes or chores
Hosting Your Book Club Discussion
Before the Discussion
- Finish the book: Both complete reading before scheduled discussion
- Take notes: Mark favorite passages, questions, reactions
- Prepare environment: Cozy space, tea/coffee, notebook
- Review key points: Skim chapter summaries if needed
- Check in: Confirm both finished and still on for scheduled time
Discussion Structure
Opening (10 minutes):
- Initial reactions: "Did you like it? Overall rating?"
- First impressions without deep analysis
- Favorite part or character
Deep Dive (40-60 minutes):
- Work through prepared discussion questions
- Analyze themes, characters, writing style
- Share favorite passages
- Discuss what surprised, moved, or challenged you
- Explore disagreements (great for discussion!)
Personal Connection (15 minutes):
- How does this relate to your lives?
- What did you learn about yourself or your partner?
- Did it change any perspectives?
Closing (10 minutes):
- Final thoughts and ratings
- Would you recommend it?
- Choose next book together
- Set reading timeline for next book
Discussion Questions
Universal Questions for Any Book:
- What was your favorite scene or moment?
- Which character did you relate to most? Why?
- What did you think of the writing style?
- Were there any passages that particularly struck you?
- What emotions did this book evoke?
- Did the ending satisfy you?
- What do you think the author wanted to convey?
- How did this book compare to others we've read?
- Would you read more by this author?
- On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate it?
For Fiction:
- Did the characters feel real? Did they grow/change?
- What motivated the main character's choices?
- Did you find the plot believable?
- What themes emerged throughout the story?
- If you could change one thing about the book, what would it be?
For Non-Fiction:
- What new information did you learn?
- Did the author convince you of their argument?
- How well did they support their claims?
- Will this change any of your behaviors or beliefs?
- What would you tell someone about this book?
Relationship-Focused Questions:
- Did this book remind you of anything in our relationship?
- What did you learn about me through my reactions to this book?
- Did our interpretations differ? How?
- What conversation did this book open up for us?
Enhancing Your Book Club Experience
Create Rituals
- Special beverages: Tea, coffee, or wine during discussions
- Cozy setup: Blankets, comfortable seating, good lighting
- Opening tradition: Always start by reading favorite passage aloud
- Rating ceremony: Formal reveal of your ratings
- Next book reveal: Build anticipation for the next selection
Document Your Journey
- Reading journal: Shared Google Doc with book list, ratings, key discussions
- Quote collection: Compile favorite passages
- Photos: Take pictures of yourselves with each book
- Bookshelf: Create physical or digital shelf of books read together
- Annual review: End-of-year discussion of all books read
Go Beyond the Book
- Author research: Learn about the author's life and other works
- Book-to-film: If there's a movie adaptation, watch it together after reading
- Related activities: Cook food from the book, visit related museums virtually
- Themed dates: Plan activities around the book's setting or themes
- Further reading: Find related books or articles to explore
Thematic Reading Plans
Travel the World Through Books:
- Choose books set in different countries
- Learn about cultures through literature
- Plan future travel based on books you loved
- 12 months = 12 countries
Decades Journey:
- Read defining book from each decade (1920s-2020s)
- Understand how literature has evolved
- Connect books to historical contexts
Award Winners Tour:
- Read Pulitzer Prize winners
- Explore Man Booker Prize books
- National Book Award selections
- Discover what makes books "award-worthy"
Alphabetical Author Challenge:
- Read authors A-Z by last name
- Discover new authors you'd never find otherwise
- Takes 26 months - over 2 years of reading!
Book Recommendations for Couples
Relationship & Love Stories
- The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid
- Normal People by Sally Rooney
- Me Before You by Jojo Moyes
- The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
- One Day by David Nicholls
Discussion-Rich Fiction
- The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
- The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
- A Gentleman in Moscow by Amor Towles
- The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt (longer commitment)
- All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr
Page-Turning Thrillers
- The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides
- Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn
- The Guest List by Lucy Foley
- The Woman in the Window by A.J. Finn
Uplifting & Heartwarming
- A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Backman
- The Hundred-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared
- The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion
- Where'd You Go, Bernadette by Maria Semple
Thought-Provoking Non-Fiction
- Educated by Tara Westover (memoir)
- Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari (history of humanity)
- The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks by Rebecca Skloot
- Quiet by Susan Cain (introversion)
- Atomic Habits by James Clear (self-improvement)
Classics Worth Reading Together
- Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
- To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
- 1984 by George Orwell
- The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
- Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
Short Story Collections (For Busy Couples)
- Tenth of December by George Saunders
- Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri
- Olive Kitteridge by Elizabeth Strout
- How to Pronounce Knife by Souvankham Thammavongsa
Overcoming Common Challenges
"I Didn't Finish the Book"
- Extend deadline: Push discussion back a week
- Partial discussion: Discuss what you've read so far, avoid spoilers for rest
- Audio boost: Listen to audiobook for remaining chapters
- Let it go: If book isn't working, agree to move on
- Prevent future: Choose shorter books, check in mid-way through
"We Hated This Book"
- Discussing why you disliked it can be just as valuable!
- What didn't work? Writing, plot, characters?
- What would have made it better?
- Learn what to avoid in future selections
- Bond over shared dislikes
"We Had Completely Different Reactions"
- This is actually great for discussion!
- Explore why you interpreted it differently
- Learn about each other's values and perspectives
- Practice respectful disagreement
- There's no "right" interpretation
"We're Losing Momentum"
- Take a break month (read individually, no pressure)
- Switch to easier, lighter books
- Try a different format (audiobook, short stories)
- Revisit why you started - reconnect with purpose
- Adjust schedule if current pace is too aggressive
"We Can't Agree on What to Read"
- Strict alternating: your pick, my pick, repeat
- Each veto one option, choose from remaining
- Read highly-rated books that bridge your interests
- Set challenge: both step outside comfort zones
- Try a month of each person's favorite genre
Taking Your Book Club Further
Online Book Club Communities
- Goodreads: Track books, read reviews, join discussions
- BookTube: Watch YouTube reviews together
- Reddit r/books: Join broader book discussions
- Instagram Bookstagram: Share your reading journey
- Author websites/social media: Many authors engage with readers
Virtual Author Events
- Many bookstores host virtual author talks
- Join these events together as a date
- Prepare questions to ask authors
- Purchase signed copies
- Adds special dimension to books you've read
Create Your Own Content
- Start a couples book blog together
- Create BookTube channel reviewing books
- Instagram account documenting your reading journey
- Podcast discussing books (even if just for yourselves!)
Literary Trips and Goals
- Visit bookstores when together in person
- Travel to settings of favorite books
- Attend book festivals together
- Set annual reading goals (52 books in a year, etc.)
- Create physical library of books read together
Special Book Club Occasions
Anniversary Book Club
- Read love stories for anniversaries
- Reread the first book you read together
- Exchange books you've annotated for each other
- Write love letters in the margins of books to give as gifts
Holiday-Themed Reading
- December: Festive books or classics
- October: Spooky stories or thrillers
- Summer: Beach reads and travel literature
- February: Love stories for Valentine's Day
Milestone Celebrations
- Celebrate finishing your 10th, 25th, 50th book together
- Special dinner date for major milestones
- Gift each other books you've annotated
- Create photo collage of your reading journey
The Long-Distance Book Club Manifesto
Consider establishing these principles for your book club:
- No judgment: All reactions and opinions are valid
- Active listening: Truly hear your partner's perspective
- Open minds: Be willing to try books outside your comfort zone
- Honest communication: If a book isn't working, speak up
- Flexible structure: Adjust schedule and format as needed
- Respect differences: Different interpretations enrich discussions
- Celebrate the journey: Focus on connection, not just completing books
- No pressure: This should be joy, not obligation
Conclusion
A virtual book club for two offers long distance couples a unique opportunity to grow together intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. Through shared stories, you explore new perspectives, discuss meaningful themes, and create ongoing conversation that transcends the limitations of physical distance.
Books become more than just entertainment—they're catalysts for deeper connection. Every discussion reveals something new about your partner's values, experiences, and inner world. Every shared book becomes part of your relationship's story, a touchstone you can reference for years to come.
The beauty of a two-person book club is its intimacy and flexibility. There's no pressure to perform for others, no rush to finish before group meetings. Just two people, exploring literature together, building a shared intellectual life one page at a time.
So choose your first book, set your reading schedule, and begin this literary journey together. Every chapter brings you closer, every discussion deepens your bond, and every book becomes a cherished part of your love story.
Ready for more ways to connect intellectually? Explore our guides on podcast listening dates, virtual museum tours, and trivia nights for couples.